A Jagged, Gaping Hole

Posted on April 8, 2012 by admin

Chris’ mom (Mimi) on left and my mother (Nana) on right at Susanna’s fifth birthday party.

I’ve been walking around the last few days with a nagging soundtrack playing in the background.

My mother is continually on my mind. She’s always there—on the outskirts of my existence. It’s similar to those fleeting thoughts of, Oh! I haven’t talked to Mama in a week. I’ll call her this afternoon or Mom will remember what’s-her-name; I’ll ask her.

Except that Mom’s not here anymore. I can’t call her to say hello or ask her the name of that person that I forgot. Losing Mama left this jagged hole in the fabric of my whole person. Sure, it hurts my heart. But my arms miss hugging her. My taste buds miss feasting on her cooking. I miss hearing her chortle (as we have dubbed her cute little utterances) and her sayings, “There’s plenty to eat around here” (in response to my and Laura’s whining that we were hungry, even though our house was stocked with food).

And so, that background music of loss and missing and grief and sadness keeps the hole gaping wide. And unlike other hard times in life, there’s nothing I can do to change it and it won’t get better this side of heaven.

It’s Easter weekend, and we opted to stay home and have a quiet meal with just our immediate family. Spending the holiday with others would have been difficult, I think. Even though we hadn’t eaten Easter dinner with Mama and Daddy in several years, any gathering from now on will certainly be hard. Because for me, the fact that others can gather and will gather also emphasizes those who are absent. Mama won’t be able to have another slice of birthday cake or bring a plate of deviled eggs to the Thanksgiving spread. We’ll always have an empty chair at the table.

So, this weekend, it feels good to be home and love my family. Yesterday, as I made my way through the grocery store, I gravitated to foods Mom always made this time of year: asparagus, roasted red potatoes, squash casserole, and cake and ice cream with fresh strawberries.

I don’t know. Cooking just seems like the good, most normal thing to do right now. Feeding my family Mom’s tried-and-true recipes is one way to soothe my soul and smooth the edges of that hole.

 

 

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Reflections on My Mother’s Last Days—Part 2

Posted on April 6, 2012 by admin

This is Part 2 of several posts recounting my mother’s last days. I need to tell her story and my story for my own catharsis but most importantly, for the glory of God. You can read Part 1 here.

As I have begun writing about Mom’s last days, I’m reminded that at the beginning of the year, I declared that my word for 2012 is Receive. On this side of my mother’s death, I find that word ironic. I think that even as 2011 wound down, God was preparing me for what was to come: the loss of my mama—a bitter mercy that I would be required to “receive.”

In part 1, I wrote about my mother’s diagnosis of and treatment for breast cancer. Around the  beginning of December, the doctor noticed a few cancer cells floating in the fluid around the lung but was not concerned. He sent her home with the instruction to enjoy Christmas. He would check her again after the new year.

That would be an appointment she’d never have the opportunity to keep.

From mid-December forward, my timeline and sequence of events blur together in one great sea of tests and procedures and phone calls and prescriptions. As I recount it here, I’m bound to put some things in the wrong order, but I know I’ll get the big picture right. (For more details about the events during this time, you may want to visit the Caring Bridge site we set up for Mom. I was pretty good at keeping it updated during that time.)

About one week before Christmas, Mom was having trouble breathing. We were supposed to celebrate our Christmas together on December 26. Mom asked to postpone our holiday until New Year’s because she didn’t feel up to it. I knew she had to feel awful if she wanted to postpone Christmas.

As it turns out, we never did get to celebrate Christmas with her. Her presents are still wrapped and sitting in a sack in the corner of my dining room.

After suffering for a few days, Laura and Daddy took her to the ER. She was diagnosed with pneumonia. She also had an irregular and crazy high heartbeat (called atrial fibrillation, “afib”). She was incredibly weak because of all that was going on in her body, plus she wasn’t eating or sleeping. Additionally, she had collected fluid around the right lung (opposite side of the cancer); once drained, it measured 1+ liter! No wonder she couldn’t breathe.

So—pay attention to these issues because they were the root of all her problems: fluid around the lung, afib, weakness, lack of nutrition/hydration. What caused this? We’re not sure. We believe that the cancer caused the fluid, which caused the afib and breathing problems, which caused the weakness/lack of sleep/lack of appetite. Put all of these on a 78-year-old woman who is already compromised because of an aggressive cancer and chemo regimen, and it becomes a really tough storm to weather. But again, those cancer cells never seemed that menacing, so who really knows?

Mom was in the CCU for several days and received treatment for the afib. She was too weak to return home, so on New Year’s Day, she moved into a nursing home for rehab. She couldn’t walk or doing anything for herself. Her therapy plan was to gain strength and learn how to do simple tasks like bathing and dressing.

We knew that her recovery would be a long one, but we were hopeful that she’d regain her strength within a couple of weeks and could return to chemo to fight those last few cells in the fluid around the lung.

At that time, none of us expected that she wouldn’t even make it to Easter.

This is the end of Part 2; Part 3 to come. Read Part 1 here.

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Reflections on My Mother’s Last Days—Part 1

Posted on March 31, 2012 by admin

This is Part 1 of several posts recounting my mother’s last days. I need to tell her story and my story for my own catharsis but most importantly, for the glory of God.

In the spring of 2011, my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. A routine mammogram had detected a lump in the left breast. It was malignant. I don’t think the doctors thought it was terribly aggressive nor worrisome. But it needed to be removed and followed with chemotherapy.

In May, Mom had a mastectomy and began chemotherapy. We were all rather matter-of-fact about the whole ordeal. This is the diagnosis. Now, let’s do what needs to be done. Our spirits were good. We knew (and said) often that the Lord was in control. And we meant it and drew strength from it.

I would say that Mom’s cancer treatment was rather uneventful. She was on a regimen of chemotherapy (through an IV port) once every three weeks or so. The treatments themselves were not bad; she said she’d read a book or watch TV while the medicine dripped into her body.

About two or three days later, though, the nausea would hit her and she’d feel awful for about five days total. Her appetite was zapped, and she had a funny taste in her mouth, to the point that she could only drink bottled water. Once that passed, she was okay and would enjoy two weeks of relative normalcy. She kept going to Bible studies and ballgames and birthday parties.

Mom’s hair fell out and she hated it. She wore cute little caps, but she was self-conscious and disappointed about her hair. I believe that the physical appearance issues were the hardest for her—losing her hair and her breast. She actually looked great, I thought. Her skin was bright and smooth. Laura and I remarked that when you lose your hair, it makes your face and skin pop that much more. It’s a good thing her skin was so pretty! I tried to get her to get her ears pierced (there’s a long history with ear piercing in our family; you can read more here) so that she could show off some colorful, fun earrings, but she declined.

Mom was always the understated one who preferred to blend in rather than stand out—unless she had something profound to say, at which point, she’d pipe up. Her ability to punctuate conversations with wisdom was a true gift and one that she executed with perfection.

And so, our summer went forward and Mom’s treatments were winding down. We had a wonderful Thanksgiving together. She and Daddy came to my house on Thanksgiving Day and celebrated with us. On the day after, we traveled to Shelbyville for our “Thanksgiving Part 2,” which always features non-Thanksgiving food, like steak or ribs and baked beans. It was fun and delicious.

A couple of weeks later, Mom had some final scans to give her the clean bill of health we all wanted—no more cancer present nor cause for concern. Unfortunately, the doctor saw a few tiny cells of cancer floating in the fluid around the right lung. I forgot to mention that this same type of cells-in-fluid had presented right before chemo started. We had it drained; that took care of it. So, we were not too worried about this.

The oncologist, too, was quite optimistic. He was fine to wait and see how the cells would change. He advised to wait until after the holidays (about 3 weeks) before checking the cells again. “Enjoy your Christmas,” he told Mom. “We’ll see what if any change has occurred after Christmas.” And so, we were concerned but hopeful and decided to have a nice Christmas together. Mom would feel good, hopefully, since she wouldn’t be in the middle of chemo. She could enjoy—really enjoy—her family and food for the first time in many months.

This is the end of Part 1; Part 2 to come.

 

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My Word for 2012: Receive

Posted on January 4, 2012 by admin

2012 Mayan Calendar

(My friend, Jamie at BlondeMomBlog, posted this cartoon with her year-end post.
I had to borrow it for mine. I love it.)

It’s a new year—the perfect time for reflections and fresh starts.

I’m a real sucker for cliched rituals like that.

And so, I look back and look forward.

I started this blog one year ago with the greatest of aspirations. I wasn’t completely sure where it would take me, but one thing was foremost. I was devoted to being intentional.

Intentionally, Chris and I set goals for our family surrounding faith, family, and finances.

And unlike most New Year Resolution Resolvers, I actually held to a state of intentionality for much of the year. In fact, I consider it somewhat of a triumph that I was at least still considering intentionality as I closed the door on 2011. I was intentional enough to at least assess my success with goal-setting.

Drum roll, please.

You know what? Most—if not all—of those “goals” I set about faith, family, and finances were not reached. In fact, most were woefully missed. As in not just “come up a little short” but more like “the target was way over there.” And I’m not being negative, just realistic. You know what this tells me? That simply having intention isn’t enough to cause change.

Hmmm.

I have a theory. I think that most (if not all) “success stories” are “accidental.” (And by accidental, I actually mean God-orchestrated.) Hard work? Intention? Determination? All of those are simply by-products of calling and God-given talent.

I think everyone has something (or a few things) that he or she is created to do. As imagers of God, we are creators. I think everyone comes hard-wired to do/be a unique something/someone. Period.

My particular temptation (for whatever reason) is pursuing everything under the sun. I see the possibilities in all things and try to fit my square peg in a round hole. No amount of “intention” or “determination” can change or improve something that doesn’t exist.

This fall, I attended the PCA International Women’s Conference in Atlanta. My friend, Nancy Guthrie, was the speaker and was absolutely fabulous. Anyway, one of the most important things I took away from the weekend was the idea that God was calling me to a special place. (And that wasn’t the topic of Nancy’s talks but was something I found to be kind of a residual effect of my learning and listening.)

He is calling me to a posture of reception. Of listening. I have always been praying and seeking his guidance about what to do. I believe he now is calling me to simply be. To watch for his moving. To identify his signs. To become still in order to hear the whispers of the Holy Spirit.

So, I enter 2012 with one word: Receive. And I’ve got to say that we’re only a few days in, and it’s tough. My mother is dealing with some health issues associated with recovery from breast cancer, and our family is navigating some sticky relationship issues. And yes, I still need to address faith, family, and fitness, just like last year.

But I come to 2012 in place of cautious expectancy with no agenda except to wait, watch, listen, and receive.

 

 

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Living Between Two Sins—Messy vs. Immaculate

Posted on December 23, 2011 by admin

Not long ago, we hosted dinner guests. I had already determined that I wouldn’t be doing extensive preparation for them for many reasons:

  1. I’m busy and tired and don’t particularly enjoy housework anyway.
  2. They have a small child and know the challenges that go with keeping house while child-rearing; I relied on the “mom sympathy” card heavily.
  3. It really is all about the fellowship and conversation.

As I quickly vacuumed (the centers of the rooms and high traffic areas) about an hour before they arrived, I remembered how Chris and I used to clean and scrub and prepare for hours on end for dinner guests. It would take us at least 5 hours or so to clean a 900 sq. foot apartment, set the table, and prepare the meal. We never conveniently closed doors or shoved something out of sight.

(In hindsight, now, I wonder, What were we doing?)

Mostly I remember being exhausted as we sat down to dinner and to enjoy our guests. I was tired, not to mention I had hours of clean-up ahead of me (by the time I handwashed my china, crystal, tablecloths, and napkins, of course).

I still have a twinge of guilt today when I don’t put in that amount of time and work to prepare for guests.

So, there’s that side of me: the side that actually wants to out-do and impress but calls it “southern hospitality” in order to sanitize the underlying sin. Perhaps some have purer motives of sacrificing for others, but I can freely admit mine are tainted. While I do want people to feel comfortable and “special” in my home, I think I’m a bit more motivated to have them think well of me.

And then there’s the other side of me that somehow rebels against the grain of “nothing’s worth it.” About ten years ago, my parents stopped doing much at all to celebrate Christmas. Of course, they still enjoy the holiday with all of us, but they stopped hanging any sort of decorations (tree or otherwise). They stopped getting any type of gifts for the adult children and stopped the fun tradition of stocking stuffers.

One year my mom talked us into having ham biscuits and fruit—a “finger foods” kind of buffet instead of a sit-down meal because it was “less trouble.” Last year, my sister and I said, “No way!” when the ham and biscuit suggestion came up. We have since commandeered the menu and come up with our own solution about what constitutes a Christmas dinner. Call us high maintenance but we like a plated, hot meal together since we only get to have it twice a year.

So, I guess what I’m saying is I have a hard time reconciling all of this. I read blogs who speak of creating elaborate meals on the fine china eaten in Sunday best; especially at Christmas, we are to “go all out” because we are welcoming a King.

I get that. I do. But I have to say that sometimes I struggle to be free enough to say that I’m OK with eating on Chinet paper plates because I’m tired or have demanding children or a full schedule or whatever. And I don’t like feeling condemned for a cluttered laundry room and plastic cutlery use.

Yet I believe our loved ones are worth the effort. To me, a sweetly-folded paper napkin can represent as much thoughtfulness as a cloth swan; a remembered tradition can be as reverent as showing up to dinner in a three-piece suit.

This Christmas, as I sit right now surrounded by littered carpets, toothpaste-splattered bathroom mirrors and multiple baskets of unfolded laundry, I am searching. Searching for a middle ground between two sins: one of apathy to the point of disregard and one of superficiality to the point of extreme self-centeredness.

Quite possibly, my Christmas guests this year will have to step over a pile of laundry to eat a meal on china—or something like that.

Photo credit: wax115 from morguefile.com

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The Unprecedented Popularity of The Crock Pot Girls on Facebook—and What’s Really Going On

Posted on September 2, 2011 by admin

I have been consumed (consumed, I tell you!) with a social media phenomenon this week surrounding the overnight success and explosive viral growth of a Facebook fan page called Crock Pot Girls. In fact, you’ve probably “liked” it and at least a dozen or so of your friends have “liked” it within the last few days.

crock pot girls on facebook

I noticed in my Facebook news feed that three or four of my friends had “liked” it, so I clicked over to see what I was missing if it was something I should “like” as well.

The Crock Pot Girls on Facebook

When I got over to the page, I noticed a rather non-descript photo of three women decked in black holding their Crock Pots (with a couple of Crock Pots on the floor—why did you put them on the floor?). The wall posts were just three- and four-ingredient recipes and lots of people saying, “I love this page!” and “I love my Crock Pot!” and things like that.

Since I’ve been in an “un-liking” mood lately on Facebook and I have gotten rid of at least a couple of Crock Pot and slow cooker recipe books at yard sales in the last few years, I chose not to like the page and move on. I can’t remember at the time how many fans the page had except that it was already passed 100,000, which I remember impressing me but not enough to have me explore it any further.

Fast forward a few days and I noticed another friend’s post about a separate website calling the instant popularity of the Crock Pot Girls page and its viral growth into question (this is a wonderful post, incidentally, and the commenters raise some interesting points). Since Wednesday night (less than 48 hours), this page has jumped from 800,000 to almost 1.1 million fans. Absolutely unbelievable.

After some research on Google through various posts and persons’ hypotheses (another post with excellent comments that you must check out), I have come to my own conclusions about this unprecedented turn of events. Here’s what I think happened (completely my opinion and speculation):

  • Three moms got together and said, Hey let’s put up some Crock Pot recipes on Facebook.
  • They did that.
  • People liked the page and their friends liked the page. (What I can’t account for between August 19 and say, August 28 or so is how so many people found out about the page. Once people were “liking,” their friends saw that and followed suit. But how did that first handful become alerted? Not sure. Several commenters on posts have said that it could have been FB bots working to get followers. Many say they’ve looked through the FB accounts of the posters on the Crock Pot Girls page and they seem to be “fake” accounts. Others say the friends who liked the page originally in their stream are now not listed as “likers” of the page. If you refresh the Crock Pot Girls FB page and watch the counter, I guarantee you it will jump 30, 40, or 50 likes per click! To me, that’s not just crazy; it’s really impossible. Will the counter ever stop, even for 5 minutes?)
  • Then, regardless of how those first thousand folks got onto the FB page, legitimate people joined, something unbelievable happened. At this point, it has become the “perfect storm” of:
    • Women love their Crock Pots (as a friend, who is a working mom of four, said yesterday when we discussed this).
    • Women are incredibly busy and don’t have the time, interest, or skills to make meals every night from scratch.
    • The FB page format capitalizes on the human ego by allowing others to post their recipes, their variations, their suggestions, and their experiences. People love to talk about themselves, even if it’s just about their favorite Crock Pot recipe (which I don’t really get, but whatever—then again, I do have a blog … ha!).

I counter the legitimate, organic nature of the growth, however, with these arguments:

  • You can Google “Crock Pot recipes” and get your hands on any type of free Crock Pot recipe you want. That’s a heck of a lot easier and streamlined than wading through hundreds of wall posts about all types of ingredients.
  • Crock Pot and slow cooker cook books abound. I have gotten rid of several.
  • As far as I’m concerned, Stephanie O’Dea is the consummate Crock Pot girl, but she devoted an entire year to a create journey through slow cooking. Through that, she has become a bestselling Crock Pot cookbook author. But it took her a year to find her fan base and maintain it. And her FB page has only 4400 fans.

The Crock Pot Girls and their “people” should expect a cease and desist letter really soon. Crock Pot is a trademark. I suspect the owners are doing their own investigation into this.

And—for the record, I love my Crock Pot. So, I consider myself one of the target audience. I am a busy mom; I work, take care of home and family. I use my Crock Pot about 3-4 times a month. But I find little value in joining this FB page and posting my recipes (readily available in a variety of places) alongside comments of my undying love for the page and my beloved kitchen appliance. I say, MAJOR disconnect between reality (what’s happening on their page) and my own experiences as a member of the target audience.

What do you think? There’s more to come in this saga and I can’t wait to see how it all unfolds. I’ll keep you posted.

Oh, and for your Crock-Pot-ing pleasure, I offer you my all-time favorite Crock Pot chicken recipe. ;)

 

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I’ve Looked in My House and It’s a Mess

Posted on September 1, 2011 by admin

This is not anything new, really. My house is always a mess.

By “house” I mean both my physical dwelling, as well as my mental/emotional/spiritual “house.”

And I straddle sanity between enjoying the permission to be unstructured with the overwhelming desire to “get it together” and get it cleaned up.

The first few weeks of school have been hard for us.  We’ve been dealing with all sorts of broken household appliances and behavior and sleeping issues with the kids while just managing the daily stuff, too.

Trying to juggle it all brings me to wallow in the low-grade guilt that I haven’t kept up with my blog or other online projects. But then of course, I begin to wonder, Why do I feel guilty? Is it awful or earth-shattering that I haven’t blogged on schedule?

I’m pooped.

And I’ve made a really hard decision. I’m turning everything off for a while. I love writing and I love dreaming about having a successful blog/online business. But something is wrong with this picture. When I start hating The Pioneer Woman because she has her own TV SHOW coming out on The Food Network, something is wrong.

I’m hoping that “pulling back” can reveal the truly important stuff.

See, I am not structured. I am not. I am not predictable nor routine. I live by a loose rhythm, I guess you’d say. Which is OK. I think it would be more OK if I just embraced it and sought the positives instead of always beating myself up that I’m “not doing so-and-so.”

And that’s what happens when I see The Pioneer Woman’s TV show promo or read posts from my blogger friends who homeschool their 15 children AND maintain three blogs AND have a book deal in the works. I just start the inner pummeling: If you really want to be successful, write books, have an online business, you’ve got to get with it, young lady. Nothing’s getting done while you’re sitting here playing Words with Friends on your iPhone.

And as true as that may be, I also realize that somewhere in a crucial and important way, it’s NOT true. Because it’s really dishonoring who I am. (And, oh, I’m a dang good Words with Friends player.) The problem is that I don’t know who I am. I know that I don’t thrive in this structured, you-must-Tweet-every-10-minutes-to-stay-viable-in-online-media world, but beyond that? Really—who am I? And what gifts do I bring? And really? What makes me happy?

What makes me happy?

Well, what doesn’t make me happy is jealousy, self-loathing, self-criticism, and constant regrets.

So, I’m off to discover how I can capitalize on how God made me. Why he gave me the gifts, talents, and preferences that he gave me. You know what? I think I’m facing the fact that I don’t think he wants me to be Blogger Extraordinaire OR homeschool my 15 children (kidding! I only have 3, but I don’t think he wants me to homeschool them, either—at least not right now). But I also know that I can’t hear from God when I have so many competing voices and pictures of “success” constantly bombarding me.

So, here’s my plan:

  • I will post here when I feel like it. Not sure what that looks like. I hope you’ll stick around but I totally understand if you ARE a structured person and like to hear from your bloggers on a regular basis. That’s just not me.
  • I’m going to unsubscribe/stop reading the “Blogger Barbies”—those “perfectly coifed” ones to whom I’ll just never measure up. It’s just not healthy for me. To the “Blogger Barbies”: I don’t fault you. I just think that I have an incredibly difficult time looking at you and your accomplishments from afar without comparing myself and obviously, we are differently gifted. But I can’t see that right now, so I must go away for awhile. I just can’t take any more posts in my news feed about how you made an entire clothing line from your discarded newspapers, traveled half-way around the world to minister to starving children, or stocked your freezer with (healthy! organic! made-from-veggies-you-grew-yourself!) meals for the next six months.
  • If you want to sign up for my email devotion, I invite you to do so, but keeping up with writing a weekly devotion is proving WAY too structured for me. Every day I go to bed thinking, Oh no. I haven’t written this week’s devotion or What am I going to write? or That has to go out tomorrow or I’ll be behind or whatever. No. I’m not going to stress about it anymore. Here’s the deal. When I have devotional thoughts, I’ll compile them and send them to my list. When/if I don’t, I won’t. Again, if you are looking for a devotion to keep you focused on a regular basis (and I understand that!), this is probably not the devotion for you. If you are interested in my devotional thoughts from time to time, then stick around.
  • I do have a few ideas of upcoming projects that I hope to complete. I have at least one eBook in the works, but I’m not sure when/if it will be finished. I’m working on it and have a loose time frame for it. That’s exactly where I want to be with that. :)
  • I need more glitter in my life. Much to the chagrin of my children, I’m setting out to fill my life with glitter. Because? Glitter makes me happy.

I hope I haven’t come across as too gripey. I’m just tired of being a slave to my own emotions and suffocating behaviors. Enough. I’m ready to enjoy my positive attributes and really seek earnestly the ways that God has planned for me to live, work, and play.

I’d love to hear your thoughts, especially if you have traveled this road and discovered something new about yourself.

Thanks for reading.

I’m off to buy glitter now.

 

 

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Easy Back to School Breakfast Ideas

Posted on August 9, 2011 by admin

Breakfast at our house can be a challenge, for a variety of reasons:

  • The kids wake up starving.
  • They could eat a country farmer meal in one sitting.
  • I don’t wake up until I’ve had two cups of coffee or it’s 10 a.m. or whichever comes first.

It’s important, then, I have some plans in place to make the breakfast routine go smoothly. One of the most important strategies for a smooth morning is to think about what I’ll be making for breakfast and the types of pans I’ll need. Key to efficiency is having the saucepans, skillets, or cookie sheets clean and utensils handy. I also want the kids to have full tummies with lots of protein, so they’ll be ready to learn.

Some of our go-to breakfast staples:

  • My Fruit Smoothie All of my kids love this. It’s filling and packed with awesome nutrients. I also make it as an after-school snack, which tides them over until dinnertime.

Smoothie Recipe (amounts are approximate)

  • 1/2 cup Good Belly probiotic juice
    (we like mango flavor) (or your favorite fruit/veggie juice)
  • 1/2 cup Strawberry Kefir (or your favorite flavor)
  • large handful each of frozen blueberries, frozen whole strawberries, and frozen sliced peaches
  • 1 large scoop of Melaleuca’s FiberWise powder (citrus flavored)
  • 1/2 cup vanilla flavored organic yogurt

Blend until desired consistency. Add more juice or Kefir to make it thinner; add more fruit to make it thicker. Makes about 6 cups.

I have also been known to throw in a grated carrot or sliced cucumber (and the taste was not affected at all). I’m going to try fresh spinach and beets next. I’ll let you know.

  • Egg Sandwich This one is easy: buttered whole wheat toast with a scrambled egg inside. Other variations include biscuits, bagels, or English muffins with sliced hard-boiled egg.
  • Grits Scramble I have one child who loves grits. She also likes a scrambled egg mixed in.
  • Sausage or Bacon & Biscuits I can buy a super-large bag of frozen (cooked) sausage patties at Aldi. They heat in minutes.
  • Fruit, yogurt, and cereal I always have fresh fruit (melon, banana, grapes, apples) on hand. My kids don’t typically like their cold cereal with milk on top. But they will eat it dry with a cup of yogurt.
  • Peanut butter sandwich Peanut butter is great to have on hand for a quick sandwich. Full of protein.
  • Frozen waffles or pancakes The boys like to eat these with a little Nutella. It’s better than straight chocolate, since it’s got some protein.

What’s your morning routine like?
What are some of your favorite breakfast recipes?
Share in the comments below.

~~~

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Ideas for Back to School Routines

Posted on August 8, 2011 by admin

Wow. We’re almost back to school, and I’m overjoyed with ecstasy I hate to see the summer end. We’ve gotten into some really bad habits this summer, though, which bears a direct correlation to my Type 1-ness  and my P-ness (on the Myers-Briggs profile), I’m afraid. We’re going to bed too late and waking too late. We’re eating breakfast at 8:30 or 9:00 and staying in our PJs until noon.

So, it’s time to turn this ship around. I’m working this week to put some plans in place and communicate our expectations to the kids. Here’s what I’ve got so far:

Back to school routines: chore chart

A chart of what’s required before school in the mornings:

  1. make beds
  2. get dressed
  3. eat breakfast/put dishes in sink
  4. brush teeth
  5. put on shoes
  6. brush hair

Weekly chore routines are going to be consistently enforced (pray for me!), with everyone doing his or her part. Here’s my chore chart; it’s five-columns (one for each member of the family, including Mom and Dad) with these chores listed:

  1. dust living room, dining room, and laundry helper
  2. vacuum living room, dining room, hall (high traffic areas)
  3. clean bathroom sinks, vanities, mirrors, toilets, gather trash/recycling
  4. grocery shopping, food prep, kitchen clean-up
  5. laundry

I use a clothespin with each family member’s name on it. Each clothespin will rotate weekly among numbers 1-3 (those are for the kids), while I’ll take 4 and Chris will have 5.

We will just require these chores to be completed by Saturday at noon. Sunday is a day of rest, and the clothespins move on Monday.

I figure this is the bare minimum we need to maintain order, we’ll all thrive in the structure, and maybe the kids will learn some responsibility skills. The rest? I’ll “catch as catch can” and not worry about it. Really. I can’t. I’m going to be working more this school year and will do well to just keep the wheels turning. Or maybe my dreams will come true, and we’ll get to hire a housekeeper.

We’re also cutting way back on TV and video games this school year. Again, pray for me to be a consistent enforcer, because my kids love their screen time. But I know there are so many more worthwhile and edifying things they could be doing instead.

Isn’t it amazing that at the beginning of the summer I had dreams of our family sitting in circles singing Kumbaya, reading stacks of library books, and doing flash card drills until everyone had leaped an entire grade level in reading and math? And here we are, drowning in our Super Mario Brothers video game addiction and sassy attitudes.

Are you anything like that, too? (Please tell me I’m not alone.)

How are you getting ready for back to school at your house?
How do you handle chores and screen time limits? Share with others in the comments below.

 

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The Power of Interruptions

Posted on August 7, 2011 by admin

I’ve written before about my often-successful ability to multi-task. I’m sort of proud of the way that I can stop and start and juggle a myriad of things at once.

But I realized recently that interruptions actually pack a powerful punch to my creative writing productivity. I catch myself thinking, Well, I’ll just throw a load of laundry in while I’m writing or I’ll get the dishes going before I sit down.

You know what? Those seemingly innocuous interruptions somehow trigger de-motivation and detachment from the project at hand; and sometimes, I become absolutely derailed.

I say, Never underestimate the power of interruption.

Going into this new school year, I’m going to be working more, both for my part-time employer, contract assignments, and my own creative pursuits. I must respect how powerful interruption is in my life. Even thoughts, responsibilities, and appointments can carry the power of interruption.

So, in an effort to eliminate distractions:

  • I’m saying no to more and more activities and responsibilities. In many ways, I hate it because I love being involved. But in identifying our priorities, our family needs me to be focused on work this fall. I’m not very focused when I’m running here and there with all sorts of things on my mind.
  • I’m aiming to begin and end my day with the most important things: the Word and the family. Getting myself back into a routine of daily Bible study and meditation and resuming our family worship time with the kids before bed will help me compartmentalize my life (can you see how much we’ve strayed into bad habits this summer?). I’m a firm believer in work at work time and play at play time. Too long, they’ve all run together in my world, making it rather dysfunctional.

What do you do to minimize distractions? How do you organize family time and work time? Share with others in the comments below.

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